My Functional Analysis professor is extremely political and, I have recently heard, a somewhat controversial figure in Budapest politics. He likes to keep us updated on the hilarious political happenings of the city, which sometimes includes telling us places to "avoid" on certain days. So far I have not been let down by studiously "avoiding" these places. Long story short, a bunch of neo-Nazis firebombed a Jewish store, then got the shit kicked out of them by a bunch of middle-aged anti-Nazis who grew up hearing stories about actual Nazis. The neo-Nazis were angry and embarrassed and tried to start a flash riot in the square outside the Jewish store. In a response to the response the President of Hungary personally went to the store, promised police-protection there, and called on people to anti-protest the neo-Nazis. And then the Prime Minister himself said he would appear to make a speech. For those who don't know, my professor sums it up pretty well: "Now, Hungarians -hate- Nazis. But they are also not so fond of the PM." Hungarians it, turns out, are also very fond of rioting. Apparently during the previous year's semester classes would sometimes be canceled on account of teargas.
Story:
So I'm trying to decide whether or not to go, since my professor made it clear that there would be a definite possibility of violence. I figure: the worst that can happen is grievous bodily harm inflicted by a Nazi, which would in fact be pretty cool. I called it a push, and off I went.
Ok, here's the setting (not drawn to scale)
Notice the 'H' shape, this will be important later.
The pink dot is the store in question. The black lines are barriers. The smiley faces are friendly police officers who are calmly trying to turn people away. The frowny faces are large, angry-looking riot squad guys in full armor.
When I arrive on the scene, I am on the 2 side, which has a moderate number of people yelling and shouting. But I can perceive though the wall of riot police in the center that there is a much larger crowd of people gathered on the opposite (1) side of the 'H' holding big protesty-looking signs (which I can't read). There are also politicians on a stage in the middle of the 'H' with their backs to us addressing the people on the 1 side, who are all cheering and chanting in response. Since the fences and riot police are almost completely blocking my view, I decide to make my way over to side 2 via the road to the south to see what is going on.
Passing by the park, I peripherally notice that there are a lot of people just milling around in it. Odd, but I don't really think anything of it at the time.
By the time I get the corner the pink bus is on, the crowd on the 1 side has grown so large that I can barely see the stage anymore, and my view is just a bunch of backs of signs and people. BUT, I notice that the 2 side of the square side has now pretty much completely emptied out. Oh, they must have had the same thought as me, so now that whole side is up for grabs. So, feeling clever about outwitting the crowds, I walk back along the southern street to return to 2.
On my way there, I notice that the crowd of people from the park have started walking towards the protest sight. I think "Hey, crowds generally walk towards interesting things. I better get in here before this side fills up as well," so I merge into the stream of people. But, as I fall in with the mass of people and slowly get sucked into the middle, I start to notice some things.
Now we peer in on my inner-monologue:
"Man. Hungarians sure wear a lot of leather. It's freaking hot out today. They must be miserable.
Ha, definite, they all look pretty grouchy.
...
Jeez, that angry metal music is playing really loud. I can't even hear the speeches.
...
...
Hey what's that fla-ohmygodimsurroundedbynazis."
Yep. I am smack in the middle of maybe 300-400 chanting, belligerent, drunken neo-Nazis all trying to crowd into the much-too-small side 2 of the 'H'. Somehow I hadn't put together the fact that that the protest zone was split into two with the fact that there were two protests going on: an anti-Nazi rallying of the community supported by the Hungarian President and PM themselves, and an actual Nazi rally whose leaders had promised to firebomb a Jewish music store.
But it's too late. I am crushed in the middle of the crowd now, and trying to turn back would mean to become an Alaskan salmon, pregnant with the eggs of her next generation, following her ancient, atavistic instincts to swim up a raging river to her ancestral spawning grounds, fighting the angry currents, desperately vaulting hostile waterfalls, and avoiding the claws and teeth of ravenous beers-- except the river is made of Nazis and the current is made of Nazis and the waterfalls are Nazis and bears are most definitely also Nazis
Nonetheless, I hesitate a little, trying to do a quick risk/benefit analysis, and as soon as I do I am immediately shoved and angrily yelled at by a man with a multiple of chrome spikes both in his face and on his shoulders. I quickly decide that my only option is forward.
Now I'm stuck on the wrong side of the protest, surrounded by angry Nazis who have started singing very angry sounding songs and who look like they want nothing more than to have a go at the riot police and counter-protesters, who vastly outnumber them and are angrily chanting back. I think about how stupid I would feel if I got killed by a Nazi. I think about how much stupider I would feel if I were killed by an ANTI-Nazi who thought I was a Nazi because I was, in all fairness, on the Nazi side of a rally. I resolve that, if I am mortally wounded, I will use my last bit of strength to crawl over to the anti-Nazi side so that I will be remembered for what I really am: a martyr for the cause of morbidly curious foreigners who, lacking language skills and cultural context, get themselves killed by treating political turmoil as a tourist attraction and accidental join neo-Nazi protests.
You see, the reason I didn't realize who the Nazis were was that Hungary, like much of Europe, had banned the display of Nazi paraphernalia. So the swastikas and SS flags I had been expecting had been replaced by other nationalist symbols like the Árpád stripes. And, of course, if I could actually read/understand Hungarian, I probably would have been a bit quicker to realize that there were very clearly defined "good guy" and "bad guy" sides.
Luckily, I manage to slowly slide my way along a wall back to the park and watch the rest of the happenings from there. The Nazis dispersed and the counter protesters cheered and there was much rejoicing.
[Note: of course, as of now the nationalists have a stranglehold on the Hungarian government. So this episode, that boiled down to a bunch of Nazis being drowned out and backing off, seems a lot more sinister now.)
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